Haldia trip and some of its consequences

Haldia, provided you know someone in that totally unplanned and polluted city, is a nice place to change your emotional state. I went there to meet my friend, allegedly my gay partner , anirban. I was with him in my high school. To cut the long and boring story short , it is enough to say that he gave me entertainment once upon a time and I gave him. Now I was accompanied by my newly growing hair, joydeb and bappa. Bappa after his breakup with god knows whom has become more funny than ever. But his only problem now is that he doesn't have patience. Joydeb on the other hand after his brief tour of rehabs and 2 month long rehab process is more calm now, but his expression has changed, and the kind of "baal chhera geche" attitude was so joydebisque once upon a time is not present anymore, though his social skills are tremendous. I haven't seen anyone with better social skills than joydeb. Anirban, after his break up with anumita, or rather forced break up with anumita , is trying to show that he is funny and really fine , and whatever happens he doesn't care, again the same baal chhera geche attitude. This is the first thing that happens after a break up, people tend to believe that they are free and blah blah, but again boss hormon hormon . I went to haldia , with few things in mind, i will talk less, no more circus, good whisky and good food ( that too free), boat trip, no discussion about relationship and any other things which has nothing to do with the people present there, and the most important part to give some peace to my otherwise impatient mind. Except the boat ride and whisky none of them were satisfied. Anirban has really big apartment there, god knows how big it is, and he is alone. I can't stay in that kind of place, it looks like a ghost place. So to make the ghost place more humanly we had to do something, so again my performance, again breaking the silence of my mind. After every such performance for few days i feel that i dont have ground below my feet, may be faking is the reason behind this. During the whoel bus trip to haldia, my mind was fresh , a volatile freshness. Wahetver I saw became a poem, most of which I dont remember, then there were lots of other ideas that came in mind. Like a story of two conflict between two groups of human beings, one group never looses their umbrella, other group always forget their umbrella. Another story was some sort of animal story where a dog falls in love with a human girl, but the girl rejects him since he doesn't look like the usual human beings and hence ugly. lots of stories, pretty surreal. But after that trip everything is messed up. Even I cant laugh at my pain anymore. I think I should start believing in god. atleast if something bad happens , i can give the blame on god.